Unpacking "The Interpreted Rock": A Journey of Meaning and Insight

By Stephen C. Schultz

I was sitting in Atlanta, waiting for a flight to Bermuda. It was actually a work-related trip, and the conversation between my wife and me as I headed out the door went like this:

“Yes, it’s Bermuda. But it’s a short stay, and we’ll be in a workshop the whole time.”

“Oh... I’m crying crocodile tears!” she mocked.

It was no use. There’s no way to gain anyone’s sympathy when you're headed to Bermuda. It is, without a doubt, a wonderful place. I’m fortunate to work with an organization that takes seriously the support and encouragement of families, no matter where they are located.

While waiting for my flight, I received a message on my phone from a friend who said it had been a while since I posted something on my blog. She mentioned that she looked forward to seeing what was next.

I mentioned this to my brother Jared, who was sitting next to me in the airport (why he was going to Bermuda with me is another story). I showed him the message from my friend and mentioned that I had a blog. He laughed. I explained that it was a blog blending personal experiences, insights, childhood memories, and situations related to work. He laughed again. So, I pulled out my phone and showed him the blog. He started reading. He laughed.

After reading for a while, he looked over, raised an eyebrow, and said,

“The Interpreted Rock?”

I told him the idea actually came from a conversation I had with “Doc Dan,” the former Clinical Director at RedCliff Ascent.

Back in the early days, when wilderness therapy programs were just beginning to be recognized as a viable treatment modality for teens, it was common for students hiking in the backcountry to get frustrated. It still is. But back then, when a student would swear, they were required to pick up a rock and put it in their backpack. While this “consequence” was meant to encourage students to “think before they act,” it soon became perceived simply as punishment—a dynamic many of these students were already very familiar with in their families of origin.

“The problem,” Dan said, “is that the rock was never interpreted! There was never any meaning brought to bear on the situation. There was no value to the students. It was simply an ‘uninterpreted rock.’”

How often in life, when we communicate with and parent our own kids, do we throw around “rocks” like:

• “You’re grounded!”
• “Because I said so!”
• “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times…!”

Do we take the time to interpret the situation with our kids? Do we encourage meaning, understanding, and insight to take root? Or do we simply allow consequences to become the proverbial uninterpreted rock in the backpack of our children’s lives?

With that explanation of my blog’s title, my PhD and trainer-of-therapists brother nodded in agreement. Then he glanced in my direction and, with a chuckle in his voice, said,

“A blog…?”

He laughed.