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Showing posts from July, 2012

When problematic sexual concerns plague your teen.

By Stephen C. Schultz My hope is that this information can be helpful to parents, allied health professionals, educational consultants and clinicians. I have been asked numerous times; “How do we know when Oxbow Academy is appropriate for a student?” and the next question is inevitably “How do we discuss these issues with families?” Please feel free to use this document as a resource and foundation for discussion with families as well as colleagues. I recently had the opportunity to speak with an educational consultant . He called to see if there was anyway we could figure out a way to admit a 19 year old to Oxbow. He went on to share with me that this boy was adopted, had some LD issues and was functioning emotionally on a 15 year old level. The current residential treatment facility, where this young man was receiving treatment, was in a cycle of “cops and robbers” with this boy because of his sneaky and manipulative sexualized behavior. This particular educational consultant

Characteristics Of Adult Children Of Alcoholics

Adapted from Adult Children of Alcoholics By Janet G. Woititz, Ed.D., 1987. 1) We guess at what normal behavior is. Because of our environment, we had no role models for normalcy, so we acted the way we saw other people act, people we thought were normal, and continue this performance into our adult lives. 2) We have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end; we procrastinate. Procrastination in the usual sense is the result of laziness. Adult children of alcoholics have never been taught how to solve a problem in systematic, manageable amounts. It was always all or nothing. Consequently, we don't have adult life skills. 3) We lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth. Lies, specifically lies of denial, were used to benefit the alcoholics and para alcoholics of our homes. 4) We judge ourselves without mercy. Since there is no way for us to meet the unattainable standards of perfection we have internalized from childhood, we are always falling

A Father's Heart Felt Letter to His 20 Something Daughter

By Stephen C. Schultz Below is a letter written by the father of a college age daughter. I have taken the names out to protect identity. This is not a foreign theme to those of us that work to mend family relationships. Dear Xxxxxxxxx, I have been thinking about you and your welfare quite a bit lately. You mentioned to me in a previous conversation; “Dad, you need to take a step back. You are too close to the situation and lack appropriate perspective.” While this appears to be an independent and mature response to communicate to your father, it is actually a manipulative way to have me “defend” my position.   In my line of work, I have seen it hundreds of times with teenagers and young adults who struggle with their parents. Teens regularly see themselves as a “peer” of their parents, even though their parents have insight, wisdom and life experience far beyond that of their children. This is a thought process that is seen regularly with teens in Jr. High or High Sch

Discovery Ranch - Learning With A Purpose

By Jennifer C. Jones There are no bells, no lockers, no football teams or cheerleaders. But that is not what makes school at Discovery Ranch different from other academic institutions.             “One of the great strengths of the ranch is the ratio of adults to students,” says Clinton Dorny, Executive Director.   “In the classroom the ratio is five to one, or less.   There is a lot of one on one instruction and all of the programs are self-paced and individualized.”             Dorny  says a traditional classroom setting of 30 students is extremely difficult for what he calls “lost or troubled students.” “If they’re with that teacher for an hour, the most the teacher could spend is about a minute with each student.”             “We have an opportunity for students to bond with a variety of adults who offer them encouragement, insight, and assistance,” Dorny explains.   “They’re not going to get that in a normal school setting.”             Clinton  says because